‘Stop holding yourself back Olivia!’

There is a post-stick note of my wall that currently states …’Stop holding yourself back.’ I am my own worse enemy. I can be really hard on myself. My expectations of myself inevitably make me hit failure. I actually ask a great deal more from myself than I would ever dream of asking from anyone else in my life.

Yesterday I was beating myself regarding something I deemed failure and my mum grounded me. She said ‘Olivia you are not superhuman. Olivia you are human and that’s okay.’ And that sunk in.

Failure is simply a stepping stone to success.

I used to have a strong sense of negative self-talk when things went wrong. But around a year ago I began to acknowledge this (hence the post-stick note) and went on the journey of changing things. I started to work on affirming myself when things went wrong and reading encouraging things that essentially helped me realise being human and things going wrong I should accept as a norm. But sometimes I fall back into my old thinking and end up being hard to myself. Changing habits are hard, but I have definitely seen progress in my thinking.

This sort of thinking, holds me and you (if you can relate) back. This sort of thinking is not of God. This sort of thinking can easily sabotage us. So get out of your head and stop thinking ‘You’re a failure’ or ‘You’re not good enough’ and start thinking … ‘If at first I don’t succeed, I’ll try and try again.’

For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

{2 Timothy 1:7}

When things go wrong, don’t let it prevent you from getting back up and trying again. Stop thinking ‘what if I fall?’ and start thinking ‘what if I fly?’

I’ve gotten into this new way of thinking when something scares me, I  think about the situation and the worst thing that could happen. The worse things are usually people’s judgement or negative opinions or something not working out. And from this, I realise that this is a massive First World Problem and if this is the worse thing that could happen, let me run with it. Regardless of what happens, in the end things, will always work out. And if I don’t push myself out of my comfort zone, God will and that will probably feel worse (because I won’t have mentally prepared myself for it). So let me run with it and fall or fly. Either one will grow me, change me, and teach me something amazing regardless.

From diary of a maverick … This is for you… Be kind to yourself, take a chance on yourself, stop holding yourself back and watch your failures turn into successes.


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